who will tell them when they need to sit down somewhere. Yesterday, I had one of the greatest afternoons of people watching, a reality show maven like myself could ask for. The America’s Next Top Model auditions hit Potomac Mills Mall in Woodbridge, VA. The event was hosted by the CW, of course, and “DC Celeb” (all of his info described him that way, not me) Paul Wharton.
As soon as I heard about this event, I made plans to attend with my little Naomi in training (for real ya’ll, she only likes posed pictures alone and she has been known to slap a mofo with a cellphone).
A friend of mine rolled to the mall with us and can I say, the event DID NOT DISAPPOINT! We got there in time for the second hour and a half. Mr. “Justine Guarini hair in jazz pants” was all-a-flutter and giving instructions. Each girl had to walk the “catwalk,” give her name, her age, height (minimum was supposed to be 5’7”), and some other little nugget if they chose. Based on how most of them were even dressed I couldn’t figure out if most of them have even seen the show. Flowy outfits, baggy jeans, club dresses, sneakers, and hair in the face was just the beginning. They also were various grades of mis-shaped, not fitting into traditional model size or plus-sized, too short and sometimes a bit too too. There were women who might be men (and not in a good way), folks with skin so bad you could see it from 30 people deep. I mean I don’t even know if make-up could help like 2-3 of these women, they might have been burn victims. And no, I don’t feel bad talking about them. They were willing to be on TV for public consumption and ridicule (not to mention Tyra’s foolishness), I just happened to catch them parading their delusions at the mall. There were maybe two girls who got up there making statements about showing the world you don’t have to be a whore or look slutty or whatever. Have you seen the show? Have you seen the naked challenge they do every season, sometimes twice? If hell froze over, the sun exploded, and pigs started flying past your butt and you became a model, what the he!! do you think you will be wearing? I could go on . . .
At the end of the day I have to ask myself: Who’s fault is it that these girls think they are models. They were not all amish girls on rumspringa who have never seen TV or magazines and don’t know what the generally accepted standards are. I am not saying the generally accepted standards of American beauty aren’t problematic, especially given that I am an African American woman, but that is a discussion for another day. Sure, Tyra definitely makes some questionable choices. Her whole last season was one big question mark, right down to the winner. I’m not hatin’ on the big girls, I just don’t think Whitney was the one to hang her hat on making a statement in that department. Have we allowed our children to become so narcissistic that they don’t know when to sit down somewhere. Have too many guys trying to get some azz told these girls, “you should be a model.” I mean dayum, I am all for pumping yourself up, cause if you don’t do it, someone else might not either. I love me some me too, but I also know when my behind needs to sit down some dayum where.
Seriously? The one with her azz out. Fa real? SMH.